The Solitary Loon

The long and winding road. Its twilight and its getting darker, but I see the shimmering light ahead. The grass is green, I see no blemish. Is there no blemish or is it just too dark to notice the subtle mistakes in the path. I see nothing, so I see no hurdle or obstacle. As I wander along this path, I wonder if its been trodden upon before.

The breeze is cool as it hits my neck. Its so lonely out here that the breeze sends a shiver down my spine. Maybe its the cold that adds to the loneliness that causes the shiver as I meander down the path like a solitary loon...

Have I chosen the path or has the path chosen me? I had the chance to take the lantern, but my strength and foolhardiness told me to follow the shimmering lights. The sidewalk is filled with leaves that fill the emptiness. The rusty sound of the leaves is music to my ears as its the only movement around...

I was so engrossed in the path and the shimmering light ahead that I had not noticed the small yet so bright lights in the forest around. I first noticed them when I had gone deep in the winding path. But these were insignificant, my destination was the light ahead. Though I did not know what the light ahead was, something inside my told me it was the light of glory. I loved the idea. I knew that nobody had been there, I would be the first.

I hear the voices that I long to hear. But then I'm all by myself, I could not be hearing voices. The void in my ears are filled only by nature. Am I losing my sanity? Its all a figment of my imagination as my life flashes before me. It could have been different, so different, yet I chose to be me. I had heard these voices before. Should I stop? Not needed, I told myself. I could comeback later. The candles that were the small source of light were speaking. My mind was playing tricks. Were the people I knew or the ones I thought I knew there in the woods? Impossible. I was ahead, way ahead, I was winning. The candles will always be there, I was going to be a torch bearer. Besides, I could always light enough candles once I get the torch. It was only a matter of time.

Though it was twilight, and getting darker by the minute, there was some light from the small candles. I didn't need them. My eyes were accustomed to the dark. I had the confidence to walk the path with no help.

The path was getting narrow, yet bright. The shimmering light was getting a clear outline. It was higher than I thought. I could see the ocean on the other side. As I came closer, I saw it. It was a lighthouse, not the torch of glory. Yet I could make my fortune. I had it in me. I completed the climb of the terrain. I was far away from the voices, far away from the candles. My ears were now resonating with the sound of the waves. This was it. Only a door away from glory....

I wanted to savor this moment. I wished it would last forever. The perseverance and sacrifice were finally paying off. The door opened.... It was closed, yet opened. The room was ablaze. I could not keep my eyes open. I was so used to being in the dark that my eyes could not face the light. It took me several hours. My mind raced on contemplating the source of light. When I was finally able to see, I noticed, that there was no source in the room. There was a mirror, reflecting and magnifying the light. I was unable to find the source of light. Yet the light from my mirror shone bright all over. I could bask in this glory.

Several years passed. I had still not found the source of light. I had not gone back to the voices. It was just me and myself. The light unnoticed had begun to fade. As I was so enticed in the glory, I did not notice this until one day, when I saw the forest brighter than the room. I walked the path again. I saw my footprints in the path. I wondered why no one took the path. As I traced the path back to where I began, I noticed the candles were dying. Several were just stumps of wax. I went close to candle that was still burning. The candle looked so familiar. It then struck me that, the source of light were these candles all this time...

Time, the ultimate seduction. It flatters to deceive. The path tells me that its never been walked upon. The path shows me the desire but its merely a mirage, its there but not there. If I had the chance, I would surely try to fill the emptiness around me before it totally engulfs me...
The future is speeding at me and the past galloping away as I toil to grab the past and hold the future. I wish it would all just stop and go backwards so that I could walk the path yet again...